. (period)

My fertility tracker has been calculating my cycle for 11 days now. I've noticed that when I  have to get up at 5am for work, and have not slept well, my temp spikes. Which can freak the tracker out, because drops in temp are a sign of ovulation. I'm still getting used to trying to read this thing. Thankfully, I have a friend who's done this before and she's been a great help.

I am super anxious about my next period. I'm worried about what it will be like. No pill = bad periods again? This is what I am afraid of. And, what's worse is that I'm starting a new job next week. I will no longer be in control of my environment like I have been. No more freedom to run to the bathroom without anyone noticing.

Unless you've ever experienced this sort of heavy bleeding, this may be hard to understand. I've had plenty of people tell me to "get over it, it's just a period." or, "I cant believe you called in, you're using your period as an excuse."

No.

I have had to call in because of this. I have had to miss out on gatherings, activities, church, you name it. It's embarrassing. Inconvenient! It makes me SO mad! I do have a prescription for Lysteda. It's supposed to help heavy periods. But it's super expensive. Around $100 for a 5 day dose. It may be my only hope at this point.

I hate how this rules over me. Sometimes I'd like them to just take it all out of me so I can be done with it.