My second month on Lupron has come and gone. I am already due for my next shot next week.
I did have a check up about a week after my second shot. Doc asked me how I felt and how the Lupron was treating me. I told him about the side effects I'd been dealing with, and he seemed pleased with how well I was doing. He told me that I could be on this drug for a year, to make sure it starved every single bit of the endometriosis out. I told him that I wasnt sure I could do it an entire year, and also, I'm not so fond of the bigger side effects it can have. The add-back drug isnt especially heart friendly, and the Lupron could diminish my bone density enough to the point of not gaining it back. I told him I'd rather finish the 6 months, and try to conceive for a few months. See how "normal" my cycles would be. Then maybe do another 6 months. He mentioned putting me on whatever drug it is that forces multiple ovulations, and asked me how I'd like to have triplets. HA! When I had my ultrasound last year, I was already polyovulating (one on each ovary) so... maybe I dont want to try that, yikes! Then he mentioned giving me the 3-month Lupron shot, and I refused. I told him that I was doing so well on the single dose, I didnt want to mess anything up with that even more concentrated dose!
I also told him about the weird scar tissue clot thing I passed and he said it sounded like it was part of the uterine lining that I shed, which is good, because it means my lining isnt building up. Which is what we want!
The second month was easier in most ways. I hardly had any hot flashes, my exhaustion was limited to a few days, and I slept a whole lot better. I dont have any cramps anymore, and I'm on day 27 of my cycle month calendar and think I should skip spotting entirely this time. I hope!!
The only issues I've had have been a few days where I just didnt feel like myself. And I've been a little bit forgetful.
Two days after the second shot (it was a Saturday and Sunday, my whole weekend off) I was a complete mess. My emotions betrayed me. I was fine. I wasnt fine. "Yes, I'm FINE!" I'd say through an outburst of tears. What. The. Heck. I spent my entire weekend pissed off. For no reason. It SUCKED. That is not me. That was a Lupron Monster.
There have only been a few other days this month where I've felt irrational, and not myself. I do not PMS all that bad (maybe a day or so) and even then, it's not like what I have been feeling on these monster days.
It was so bad, in fact, that when I told Matt that I was getting my next shot on Tuesday, he said "Shit. Two days before Thanksgiving?!"
That made me feel awesome.
Other than all of that, I'm sort of feeling indifferent to the idea of having more children. It's still some days I want one, some days I really dont. I guess I'm just waiting to see where God is taking me. How is he using all of this? What is he stripping from me? What am I gaining from this? What will be the end result?
I dont know. But HE does. And it's better than anything I can imagine.
